WSOP Preview Extravaganza!

On Thursday May 31st I'll once again be heading back to Vegas to take a shot at a high six figure pay day in the World Series of Poker! As most of you know last years WSOP was the reason that I started this blog and was a collosal, monumental, extra large failure. I played 10 events, and while I like how I stacked up against the competition in most of them, I got hosed in one way or another in all of them.

Even in the one event in which I made the money I got jobbed. On my final hand I went broke when the player in the big blind (Michael Mizrachi AKA The Grinder supposedly one of the top 25 best players in the world) called wiht AJ after the player on the button moved all in with 77 and I moved all in over the top with KK. Even before the cards were turned over he said he knew he was behind, but was "gambling" in an attempt to win a big pot. Of course he flopped an ace and busted both me and the other guy. And then what did he do? He went broke on the very next hand! I had to stand there in line to get paid with him standing right behind me for ten minutes!

I'm getting all worked up here so before I get too carried away and start devising a plan to pie Mizrachi in the face I'll get on to this years preview and leave the past in the past. This year I'm only playing in 3 events and here's the scoop on all three.

June 2nd Event #3 $1,500 No Limit Hold 'em

Other than the main event this should be the event with the most newcomers and inexperienced players since it's got a small buy in by WSOP standards and is the first event other than the employees event and a $5,000 mixed limit/no limit event event. Last year there were 2,776 entrants and there would have been more if the room was bigger. I finished somewhere in the range of 2,100th place when I lost with AA against KQ (an 87% favorite preflop). I expect this year will have a similar turnout and hopefully better results for me. Here is a list of the top 20 finishers and their prizes.

1 Brandon Cantu (BC, Canada) $757,839
2 Phong Ly (CA, USA) $416,816
3 Drew Rubin (FL, USA) $226,597
4 Lee Padilla (CA, USA) $176,579
5 Brent Roberts (NY, USA) $151,570
6 Don Zewin (NV, USA) $126,940
7 Ron Stanley (NV, USA) $107,614
8 Mark Swartz (AZ, USA) $88,668
9 Carlos Mortensen (NV, USA) $71,617
10 Tom Nguyen (NV, USA) $56,081
11 Jennifer Harman (NV, USA) $51,155
12 Jack Rosenfeldt (CA, USA) $46,987
13 Ali Eslami (CA, USA) $43,197
14 Chad Burum (CA, USA) $39,408
15 David Baker (TX, USA) $35,619
16 Adam Smith (TX, USA) $31,830
17 Steve Hohn (KS, USA) $28,040
18 Stuart Krasney (CA, USA) $24,251
19 Jorge Walker (CA, USA) $20,462
20 Paul Smith (CA, USA) $20,462


June 3rd Event #4 $1,500 Pot Limit Hold 'em

If you were betting on which tournament I was most likely to make the money in this would be the smart one to choose since both of my past WSOP cashes have been in pot limit events. I'm not sure why that's been the case since pot limit and no limit are almost the same once you get well into the tournament and the blinds get big, but maybe it will give me a little extra confidence when I sit down to play. Last year there were 1,102 entrants in this event and I finihsed 58th. Other than the money, the highlight of this event last year was I spent the entirety of day 1 playing at the same table with former world champ and super nice guy Chris Fergeson. I don't know why people dislike pot limit and love no limit, but I'm sure this event will have half the turnout of Event #3. Here are the top 9 finishers and their prizes from last year.

1 Rafe Furst $345,984
2 Rocky Enciso $180,508
3 Eric "Rizen" Lynch $104,544
4 George Bronstein $75,212
5 Burt Boutin $60,169
6 Can Kim Hua $52,648
7 Richard Chase $45,127
8 John Juanda $37,606
9 Alan Gilbert $33,845


June 4th Event #6 $1,500 Limit Hold 'em

The best thing about limit tournaments is you can't go broke on one hand early in the tournament. The first few hours can be a little boring since the betting limits are relatively small and insignificant, but hopefully it will give me a chance to get a feel for my opponents without much on the line. Last year there were 1,068 entrants in this event and I didn't play because I was in day 2 of the pot limit event. Here are the top 9 finishers and their prizes.

1 Kianoush Abolfathi $335,289
2 Eric Buchman $174,938
3 Josh Schlein $101,318
4 Michele Lewis $72,891
5 Vipul Kothari $58,313
6 Hank Sparks $51,029
7 Patrick Maloney $43,735
8 Lars Hansen $36,446
9 Matt Welsby $32,801


All three of these events are three day events. The first day you play from noon until roughly 2 a.m. with 20 minute breaks every 2 hours and a 1 hour break for dinner in the 6:45 p.m. range. At the end of day 1 all of the remaining players will be in the money. On day 2 you start at 2 p.m. and play until only the top 9 players remain who then come back the next day for the conclusion.

Unlike last year when I needed to go very deep in at least one event or make the money in 3 or 4 consider the trip a success, this year just making the money in one event will make the trip a success. Also in contrast to last year, I'm not feeling any pressure at all. The money involved is a small fraction of what was at stake last year and as per usual when I go into a big buy in event the money has already been set aside and it won't be a big deal if none of it comes back. Wish me luck and I'll do my best to update the blog daily with results from Vegas.

What a Difference a Day Makes

On Saturday I had my worst day of the year so far. I took Sunday off and on Monday I got back all but $11 of the money I lost on Saturday. I've noticed that I have a much more difficult time with the weekend players. I am certain that the weekend players are worse and you'd think that would make them easier to beat, but in practice that hasn't been the case for me.

I have a few theories as to why that might be. I think the main problem is that two pillars of my game are bluffing at a ton of small pots and avoiding putting in all of my chips in close situations. The weekend players have a tendency to call with much worse hands so those small pots that I'd normally win aren't coming my way. Furthermore players who aren't very good, but have some experience have a tendency to make big bluffs more often. Consequently I'm faced with more tough spots where I have to make a decision for more chips than I'd like to.

Another problem is that one of my strengths is playing hands in a certain way and betting specific amounts in order to convince my opponent(s) that I have a specific hand that is different from what I actually have. The regular weekday morning and afternoon players are pretty good (but not great) so they spend time thinking specifically about what I have. It's possible to convince them I have a perticular good hand when I don't and a bad hand when I have a good one. Conversely, you can't make a bad player think you've got something different than you do because they're not thinking that hard. They're mostly focused on what they have and sometimes it doesn't really matter what you do.

Or I'm just running bad on the weekends. It's really difficult to tell.

Meanwhile the pokerstars double frequent player point (FPP) promotion ends today. I have mixed emotions about the ending of this promo. I'm sad that after a week and half of piling up FPP's at an insane rate, I'll have to go back to generating them at a slower pace. But I'm happy that I can take a guilt free day off in the middle of the week.

After a sweet day yesterday and another good one today the last 10 days have been a solid success. I didn't make it to my upper end goal of 30,000 hands in 10 days, but I came within a whisper of my secondary goal of 25,000 hands. If I didn't get my doors blown off on Saturday I would have played on Sunday and finished in the 28,000 hand range, so I feel ok about how hard I worked.

More importantly I used the FPP's I earned in the past 10 days alone to purchase an entry in a $1,500 WSOP event! The rewards for playing at pokerstars are hands down the best of any poker site. For playing the same amount on another site I'd probably have enough points for a sweatshirt and a box of golf balls. You can keep that shit! Give me the WSOP seat baby!

My goals for the month are going great. Since I worked so hard this past week and a half I've already played 45,000 hands this month. Out of the remaining 9 days in the month I'll only have to work 5 to make my goal of 60,000. Also the hands that I've played have been quality hands. If the month ended today I'd be ahead $1,200 more than any other month this year and if I can keep the pace up I'll have about the 6th best month I've had in the past 4 years.

Also a reminder that I'm off to Vegas for 5 days of WSOP and general merriment on May 31st. Look out for a WSOP preview extravoganza the like of which you've never seen! Not really. In actuality it will be a brief preview, but look out for it anyway!

10 Billion Hand Bust

The 10 billionth hand on pokerstars came and went today. The hand was dealt on a 6 handed 1 cent/2 cent no limit table which is the smallest possible limit. The hand was dealt and then frozen so an announcement could be made and other players could come watch. After ten minutes of the support personnel making sure that everyone knew what was going on and saying MANY, MANY times that the winner of the hand would get $100,000 they let the action play out.

Then I got to witness without a doubt THE WORST PLAY IN POKER HISTORY! Two people folded! Let me say it again. TWO PEOPLE FOLDED! HELLO! The winner of the hand gets a hundred grand and two of the six players at the table folded before the flop! I can't stop saying it, TWO OF THE PLAYERS AT THE TABLE FOLDED! One had about $5 and the other about $1.75 and they must not have had a brain cell between them. Everyone at the table got $10,000 and a $5,000 entry into the WCOOP main event. They'll probably go blow it all on shiny objects or DVDs of the movie Catwoman or whatever it is that morons buy. How in the world could you be so oblivious? Incredible.

So who won the hand? The player in the big blind who started the hand with 82 cents (82 cents! Jesus!) and had no idea what was happening at the beginning of the hand. She clearly didn't know about the promotion, but managed to figure it out after support told the players 75 times that the winner would get $100,000. She got dealt 83 of clubs and made a flush to win the biggest pot in the history of 1 cent/2 cent blinds poker. Congratulations to Justine0003 who I will envy for a long, long time.

I managed to be playing during about 30 of 100 smaller milestone hands and not only were none of them were dealt on one of my tables, but none were dealt on any $1/$2 or $2/$4 blinds NL games period.

Meanwhile I had my worst day of the year today. A miserable, miserable day where I managed to combine the forces of bad play on my part and absolutely horrible luck. I couldn't do anything right today. It felt like I made the minimum on the winning hands I had, lost the maximum on the big losers I had, bluffed into made hands (I actually moved all in against a Royal Flush yesterday) and checked into hands I could have won by bluffing. And I also got TOTALLY SCREWED over and over. I kept getting pocket aces or kings and either winning $6 or losing $100.

I'd intended to play for the next three days to take advantage of the remaining days of the double FPP promotion, but as a general rule if you have you're worst day in 6 months (I lost a few more dollars on December 3rd 2006 than I did today) you need a day off. Also I've worked 7 days straight and 17 of the past 19 so I can't feel like too much of a slacker. What a terrible depressing day!

On Monday I'm going to try something that I've been wanting to try for a while. I'm going to play as many hands in one day as you would get dealt in a month playing full time in person. It's 5,600 hands which should take me 12-13 hours of actual playing time. There's a fair chance that my brain might shut down about 3/4 of the way through because while I've played 12 hours in a day before it was usually 12 hours of 1 game in person with breaks or 12 hours of 2 or 3 big multitable tournaments online so the effort wasn't as intensive. If I can make it to 5,880 that would be the same as playing 24 hours a day for a week without missing a hand. I'll let you know what happens.

Mental Toughness Required

Playing poker for a living is definitely an occupation that requires substantial mental toughness. Sometimes it feels like everything that could possibly go wrong is going wrong. Out of nowhere all of your bluffs are getting called, your big hands are running into bigger hands and none of your drawing hands are getting there. You see good hand after good hand get squashed and you think to yourself, "What happened to my money? If only this had gone differently and I hadn't done that."

I can tell you from 7 years of experience (both my own and from watching other people) that the natural reaction is to go completely nuts. Your heart tells you "Get in there! You better win this pot now! You can't wait for the next hand you have to win this one!" Some players listen and play every hand as aggressively as possible and take wild chances in a desperate effort to get that money back. Others manage to ignore their heart and listen to their brain which is telling them "Stay calm. Wait for a good hand. It wasn't that much money. IT'S OK! DON'T PLAY THAT HAND YOU IDIOT! FOLD! FOLD! FOLD!"

Hanging on to your composure when you start losing pot after pot is like charging into the ocean trying to make it to a boat. If the waves are small and spaced out you can make it, but if they are huge and come one after another then even the strongest person will be repelled.

Similarly, losing a few pots close together isn't hard to handle if they are small and losing a big pot here and there is ok too. It's just part of the game. But if you lose several big pots in quick succession wiping out days worth of profit it's almost impossible to stay totally calm and think rationally.

The trick is being able to let that emotional response pass and get back to playing your best as quickly as possible. It might take 5 minutes or 5 hours or 5 days depending on the amount of money involved and the way things went down. Part of being a pro is getting back on track right away.

Lately I've been trying to focus on having the mental toughness to bounce back as quickly as possible. Luckily for me no matter what happens or how upset I am, my absolute worst is still pretty good. While I'm not sure how good my "A game" is, I'll take my "F game" against almost anyone's.

Unfortunately I had the chance to work on my mental toughness today under extreme circumstances. I was in 6 NL cash games and I lost all of my chips in 4 of them in the span of about 3 minutes. First I lost $200 when I made a straight on the turn at the same time that another player made a flush. He made a huge bet and I decided that there was about a 45% chance he had a flush and a 55% chance that he didn't. I was wrong and lost. Just after, I picked up QQ and lost $200 to a player with AA. Then I lost $100 with AQ to QJ when the flop came down Q J 5 and I didn't improve.

At this point I was not happy. Not only did I just blow through $500 in no time at all, if I was playing really great I probably could have saved some of that money. Of course they were all tough spots and I certainly didn't make any big mistakes, but it wasn't like there was no way I could have gotten away from those hands and I was doubting my decisions.

Maybe 45 seconds later I picked up JJ and I thought to myself "Pleeeease make this one easy on me." Someone open raised the minimum (to $8), another player called, I made it $24 and they both called. The flop came down J 7 3 with 2 hearts. Ah Ha! I bet $40 and one of the other players moved all in. Not only did I have the best possible hand, but no matter what my opponent had I was at least 75% to win and most likely they were either a 10 to 1 underdog or drawing dead. I guessed I was up against a flush draw or an over pair so when the turn came an 8 and the river came a 9 I was sure I'd won. For a fraction of a second I considered that they might have pocket tens, but then I realized that made no sense. When my opponent turned over A 10 of hearts and took the pot it felt like I'd been punched in the chest. Another $400 pot headed the wrong way.

That money isn't that important and I've lost literally thousands of $400 pots in my lifetime, but man, losing that pot right after those other three really hit me hard.

Then I thought "This is actually great, because it gives me a chance to work on my mental toughness!" If you believe that I have some magic beans I can sell you for only 11 easy payments of $49.95.

Happily, I did manage to have a total luck 180 right away. While the turn and river were coming out in the hand with the jacks I got dealt AK on another table. I raised, flopped an ace and some doofus with 89 which was no pair, no draw, decided to blow all in and I doubled up. Over the next 300 hands or so I managed to pick up 5 or 6 medium pots and finally one more big one (along with the standard compliment of little ones). After the big one I saw I'd recovered $685 of the $700 I blew through. At that point I promptly called it a day feeling like I'd been battered by enough waves for one day.

I'm still on target for my May goals. I've played 33,000 of my 60,000 hands for the month and I'm only slightly off the pace of playing 30,000 hands in the 10 days of the pokerstars double FPP promotion. I've had 9 winning days and 5 losing days so far, but my biggest losing day was under $300 and I've had three winning days in the plus $1,000 range.

There's never a bad time for a good streak, but since I'm going to need an extra $2,500 or so for my trip to the WSOP and Jen is going to be too pregnant to work right around the corner this has been good timing.

A little gift from pokerstars

Pokerstars made an announcement that they are going to have a bit of a blowout as they approach the 10 billionth hand dealt in their history. When I first started playing online poker in 2004 Party Poker who was the big dog at the time had dealt more hands than any other site. In the five years that they'd been in operation they'd dealt 250 million. Pokerstars expects to deal half that many in the next 10 days and has dealt over 5 billion hands in the last year. When they say poker boom the mean BOOOOOOOOM!!!

So what are they giving away? The lowliest thing is they're adding a few thousand dollars in prize money to about a dozen daily tournaments from now until May 22nd. I'm not going to bother squabbling over that money.

More significantly they are adding $100,000 to the prize pool of the $215 buy in "Sunday Warm up" and $250,000 to the prize pool of the $215 buy in "Sunday Million." The first usually draws about 2,000 players and the second usually draws about 7,000 (and I expect they'll get about 50% more players than usual) so the added money isn't that significant.

In my estimation there will be about $50 in extra equity total if I put up $430 and played both tournaments. However this added money should attract players that normally wouldn't play in these tournaments and for many of them it will have no business playing in a $215 tournament. So on top of the small added bonus money, the fact that the field will be much weaker than usual should add some significant additional value.

Another thing which is always nice is they're offering a 25% deposit bonus on deposits up to $600. For me this is a free $150!

The most exciting thing for some players is they are giving away money to the players that are dealt in on every millionth hand starting with #9,900,000,000. The amount varies depending on the size of the game you're playing in as well as your VIP level and the winner of the actual hand gets much more. The lowest amount would be if you had no VIP status and were playing in micro level games. The winner of the hand would get $250 and the other players dealt in all get $100. I won't go through all the permutations, but the bottom line is for me I'll get paid $2,400 if I win one of those 100 hands and $900 if I'm just dealt in. That would be sweet!

No one knows which tables the key hands will be dealt on, but you can see the hand counter going up so I'm going to make sure I'm playing in 10 games when the key hands are going to be dealt as often as I can. Obviously I won't be playing when all 100 hands get dealt since one is going to happen about every 2.5 hours for the next 10 days or so, but I might be able to at least be logged on and playing when 50 of them are dealt. I have no idea what kind of dollar value to put on this part of the promotion, but I sure will be fired up if I get any piece of that money.

Not surprisingly the ten billionth hand will be much more significant. Getting dealt in is worth $10,000 plus a $5,000 seat in the WCOOP main event and winning the hand is worth $100,000! You can bet that when that hand gets dealt pokerstars will have more players logged on than they ever have before. I will personally be in more games than I ever have before. I'm taking my monitor to max resolution and shrinking those games down as much as I can to give myself the best chance.

When I first started thinking about this I thought "Ha ha! I'll have about a 1 in 1,000 chance at hitting this one!" But I think it's actually much better than that. Pokerstars usually has around 10,000 games going, but the majority of them are play money games and some more are multitable tournaments which don't qualify (only SNG's tables and cash game tables count) I'm going to estimate that for the big hand there will around 2500 qualifying tables and if I'm in 15 games that will give me a 1 in 166 shot of being in the big hand. For the lesser earlier hands there might be as few as 500 qualifying tables if it's late at night meaning I'll have a 1 in 50 shot of hitting each one if I'm in 10 games each time. All of a sudden I'm a little more excited about this part of the promotion.

All that stuff is great, but by far the best thing for me is DOUBLE FPP's for 10 days! Normally I get about $32 in FPP's for every 1,000 hands I play. Between now and May 22nd I'll be getting $64 for every 1,000 hands. If I bust my hump I think I can play between 25,000 and 30,000 hands between now and the 22nd. Which means this part of the promotion will be worth close to an extra $1,000 for me. Thanks pokerstars!

My Last Hand of the Day

I had an interesting hand come up on Thursday. I'd put in my full days work and I'd left 5 out of the 6 games that I'd been playing in. In my last remaining game (a $2/$4 blind no limit hold'em cash game) I was ready to take my last hand of the day. I'd had an uneventful day and found myself ahead a little under $100.

Already thinking about watching the NBA playoffs (Go Warriors!) I was expecting to pick up a crappy hand, dump it, and call it a day. Instead I picked up 88 which while not a fantastic hand, was good enough for me to play. I had just under $160 in front of me which meant if I went broke I'd end up having a losing day and probably a bit of a bitter taste in my mouth. "I'll be careful with this one," I thought.

I raised it to $12 and decided I'd be fine with picking up the $6 in pot. But I got called by one player in the field as well as the player in the small blind. The flop came down Q 9 8 with three different suits. I'd flopped three of a kind which I thought was almost certainly the best hand. This is a situation where normally I would consider checking to disguise the strength of my hand, to give the other players a chance to bet if they had a hand like KQ or AQ, to let someone bluff at the pot if they missed or to give my opponents an opportunity to catch something on the turn that would lead them to calling the rest of the way (that was a bit of a run on sentence!). Of course, while there are those benefits, sometimes checking in a spot like this blows up in your face when one of your opponents makes a hand even better that yours.

I decided not to mess around and bet out $24 into the $38 pot (Pesky pokerstars had already take $2 out of the pot for those of you about to challenge my math...E.B.). I was surprised when I got called by both players. I started to think about what they might have and what the chances were that I was behind. I didn't think either had QQ because neither reraised before the flop. The player in the field was a solid regular player and I didn't think he'd call a raise with J 10, but the small blind could have J 10 and be slowplaying a straight. Either player could have 99 and be slowplaying a set. Of course there were 165 possible two card combinations out there all of which I could beat so while I wasn't sure I was going to win the pot, I still liked my chances.

The turn was a five which I thought was a fantastic card. Unless someone had 67 it didn't change anything. The pot had $110 in it at that point and I bet out $60 expecting at least one, if not both of my opponents to give up and fold. Instead the player in the field made it $120 and the other player called all in for his remaining stack (which was a little over $100). Uh oh! I was pretty sure I was beat in one spot and thought there was a chance that I was in third place, but no way was I folding to save my last $60 when there was already almost $400 in the pot.

I crossed my fingers and called for a five on the end. I was pretty sure I'd need to improve to take down the pot and I thought the small blind might have a hand like Q9 so a 5 seemed like my best bet. Come on five! Put a five one it! Five it up! The river came out and it wasn't a five...it was the last eight! Quads baby! Send it!

I made the total nuts on the river so I didn't have to worry about what my opponents had. But I was still curious. It turned out the player in the field who I thought was too good to call my raise with J 10 had called me with 67 and hand turned a straight. The other player who should have folded before the flop, on the flop and on the turn showed 95. I guess he figured he should call before the flop since he was in the blind, he managed to turn second pair and made two pair on the turn. Every decision he made was a massive mistake, but it worked out great for me.

That one pot turned an otherwise marginal day into a solid winning day. Also I just wrote another post on a totally different topic which should be right below this post. Check it out.

A Tiny Bit of Good News for Online Poker

A few days ago Brian Ridgeway sent me an article from MSN that started with the following paragraphs:

Just six months after President Bush signed a law outlawing online gambling, a key Democratic politician has proposed lifting the ban.

Rep. Barney Frank, a Democrat from Massachusetts and chairman of the House Financial Services Committee, on Thursday introduced a bill that would replace the current broad prohibition with strict regulations, including criminal background checks and financial disclosure, imposed on companies that seek to offer legal Internet gambling.

"The existing legislation is an inappropriate interference on the personal freedom of Americans and this interference should be undone," Frank said. His bill is called the Internet Gambling Regulation and Enforcement Act.

This can't be bad news. You can read the rest of the article here.

The article has a link to the full text of the actual bill. I read through most of it and it seems promising. Maybe there's hope for internet gambling yet!

It's the Dollars, Not the Pots

The first two days of May have been solid. I've played 6,033 hands which is 10% of my goal for this month. Yesterday I almost had a breakout day when I managed to get ahead almost $700 before I took my lunch break. But, my lunch must have been cursed (Damn those Voodoo practicing grocery store employees putting a hex on my eggs!) because I gave most of it back before the end of the day and ended up winning about $250.

Today was sort of the opposite. I struggled all morning and found myself about even after 2,000 hands. But after eating some blessed shrimp and rice for lunch today, I got crazy hot in the last 1,000 hands of the day and ended up winning just shy of $1,100 for the day.

One interesting thing that happed to me yesterday was playing against a guy who was absolutely terrible, but who won more pots over a small stretch than anyone I've ever seen. During the time I was at the table with him he played 100% of hands to the flop and about 80% all the way to the showdown. The crazy thing was he kept hitting enough hands or bluffing enough people out to keep his head above water.

Pokerstars has a feature (instant hand history) where you can look back and see what happened in every hand since you joined the table. It seemed like this guy (bison bear) was winning almost every pot so out of curiosity I checked the history. In a span of 39 hands he won 27 pots including one stretch where he won 8 straight, lost one, and then won the next 5!!

Assuming that you should win one pot in every 9 it should take you 243 hands to win 27 pots. Much more dramatic is the fact that the chance of winning 8 straight pots should be 1 in 43,046,721. If it was all about the cards, the chances of winning 27 of 39 would be about the same as getting hit with a meteor while you are being struck by lightning on the way to cash in your winning lotto ticket.

But, of course it not always about just the cards. If you're willing to push hard at every pot regardless of the consequences you can bluff your way to victory in quite a few pots. And if you're also nailing a ton of flops you're going to win a bunch more.

You'd think winning so many pots this guy would be up several thousand dollars. WRONG! He'd win a bunch of small pots with massive over bets and then lose it all back when someone else made a hand. He started with $200 and while he managed to run it up to $800 he blew it all back in a dozen hands. He was playing like he had a $2,000 bet that he could win more than half the pots for a half hour or something along those lines.

It was interesting to watch and profitable for me as I was one of the people who relieved him of his winnings once he stopped connecting with the board cards. I've searched for him a few times since, but I guess he hasn't been playing. If I do find him again I'll get into his game as fast as I can and play until I go unconscious or he runs out of money.

April Recap, May Goals and WSOP Heads Up

While April started with a downpour of cash into the Huff money buckets, the buckets sprung a little leak in the middle of the month. April was my best month so far this year, but I know I could have done better and I'm pretty disapointed with my effort level.

While my goal at the begining of the month was 60,000 hands of NL cash games, I only made it to 45,000. I knew 60,000 would be difficult since I had a 5 day vacation in the middle of the month, but 45,000 was still a sub par effort. I had too many days where I stopped playing at 2,500 hands instead of my target 3,000 and a few more where I had to stop after 1,500 or 2,000 because I'd lost my composure after some hard luck. I'll need to work on my mental toughness this month.

I also could have performed a little better in the time I spent playing. I came up just a hair short of my goal for cents per hand in the $1/$2 games and after a few massive beatings, I came up a good ways short of my goals for the $2/$4 games. Of course, the good news is I made more than enough to pay the bills for the month of April and that's really the most important thing.

In May, I'm once again going to shoot for 60,000 hands. Since I have no significant time consuming plans in May and there are 31 days instead of 30 I should be able to make it without too much difficulty. I'll once again be targeting 10 cents per hand in the $1/$2 games and instead of 20 cents per in the $2/$4, I'll be looking to make 15 cents a hand.

I'm also going to add in the goal of 15 workouts. As some of you know I'm in the middle of a weight loss bet with 4 friends that started in the beginning of January. It was supposed to end June 5th, but when the end of April rolled around and none of us were more than 1/2 way to out goal we decided to back off the weigh in until September 1st. So far I've lost about 12 of the 25 pounds I need to drop (I have put on some nice muscle tone though), and after a solid effort for the 1st 3+ months, I've totally slacked off the past few weeks. But, in the words of all of the world's slackers, "Tommorow, I'm going to get back on track!"

I'm going to go on record here and say if I don't make it to 60,000 hands and 15 workouts I'm going to need someone to chum me up and get on the pirahna phone.

Another thing on the horizon is the WSOP, which everyone (Everyone? Yes everyone!) knows was the genesis for this blog (This is my 128th post in less than a year!). This year unfortunately will not be the extravoganza that the 2006 WSOP was. While the WSOP is scalling up (they've gone to 55 tournaments this year up from 40 something last year) I'm scaling down.

On top of the money I lost in the tournaments last year, there was also a great deal of opportunity cost in spending three plus weeks in Vegas (my backers paid for almost all of the expenses so that wasn't a big deal - Thanks again guys and sorry!). It's expensive to not generate any of your standard income for almost a month.

This year I'm only going to play 3 events: $1,500 NL Hold 'em, $1,500 Limit Hold 'em and $1,500 Pot Limit Hold 'em which will take place on consecutive days starting on June 2nd. If I was to go deep in one of these events I'd probably stay and play at least 1 or 2 more. I was pleased to hear that they are doubling the number of starting chips this year, so for $1,500 we'll be getting 3,000 chips to start instead of 1,500 while the blind increases and level lengths remain constant. This means there will be even more play and a greater chance for skill to be the deciding factor.

For my backers from last year, if you're feeling brave (VERY brave) I'll give you a chance to take a piece of me again. I think I want about 40% of my own action which leaves 60% on the market.

If I win this year I'll pay out at 100% up to the amount you've lost on me in any WSOP tournaments and then 90% above that. For example, let's say you lost $1,000 of your investment last year and this year you have 25% of my total action. If I have a net win of $10,000 you'll get paid $2,350 ($10,000 X 25% = $2,500, but you'll get paid $1,000 at 100% and $1,500 at 90% or $1,350 so you're total = $2,350). Also I'll ask that whatever percentage of the action you take, you also take the same percentage of the expenses.

I hope everyone has a great May and I'll keep you posted on any significant (and some insignificant) happenings.

The Chat Box Makes Me Crazy

At every online poker table there is a chat box where the players can talk to each other. Typically in the bigger games there is no chat whatsoever because most of the players are focused on playing instead of chatting. Some of the players just don't care to chat and others are playing in so many games that they can't pay attention to the chat and play at the same time (usually I fall into the latter category).But as you might imagine, there are some people that use the chat box even if no one is responding or paying attention.

The area where the chat is displayed has 4 tabs (chat, stats, info and notes) and I try to click on one of the other tabs so I'll have something on my screen in that area other than the chat. But the chat tab is the default sometime I can't help but notice what people are saying.

I think the original intent of the chat box was to make the game seem more like a real poker game where people are talking all the time. What it seems to be in actuality is a place for people to bitch about their bad luck to a bunch of people who don't care.

It's also a place for know it alls to show off how much they think they know. These guys always have names like "kidsgotskillz" or "thnx4yourmoney" or "Iruleallpoker" and none of them are any good. They tell the other players how bad they're playing (usually just after they lost a pot). They call other players donkeys (really!) which somehow became a term that people who think they are personally awesome in every way use for people who they think are bad poker players. Sometimes they shorten it to simply "donk" as in, "How could you call me there you ****ing donk!" Of course these mental giants often don't bother with full sentences and simply type in "DONK!" or my personal favorite "DONK DONK DONK!"

A few other common expressions that drive me bananas are "obv," and "omg." You'd be shocked (shocked!) to see how many people type in obv after they lose a pot in which they had the best hand at some point. To the best of my knowledge it means something along the lines of "OBViously that was going to happen...obviously I was going to lose that hand because the universe is against me...obviously I am a great player and the only way I could lose was if the fates smashed my hopes of winning that pot like a blacksmith smashing a egg on fiery anvil. Obviously."

OMG is short for "Oh My God" and it also typically comes out right after someone loses a pot. It always makes me think that the person saying it is a 13 year old girl. As in "Like, oh mah god...Tiffany (all 13 year old girls have friends named Tiffany)...I, like, just totally lost that pot to a TOTAL gut shot straight!"

For the record anyone who types in "omg obv" (I've seen it before) should be covered in chum and tossed into piranha infested waters.

A few times after people have won pots from me I've seen them type in "Oops." As in a (totally sarcastically) "Oops! Did I just win that pot? Oops I didn't want that to happen! OOPS! Sorry!" More frequently I find myself in a spot where I know my opponent either has something like a full house or absolutely nothing. So I call, and they have the full house and then they type in "thank you" or "ty." Bastards! Why can't they just take the pot and be happy about it? I have no patience for people who rub it in when they win. Once again, chum 'em up, get on the piranha phone, call in some piranhas, and chuck 'em into the water.

Like I said, I try not too look at the chat box and even if I do glance at it for whatever reason 99% of the time I have no reaction whatsoever. But today I happened to look down in one of my cash games and someone hit me with a "ty" after beating me in a big pot. Then a minute later in the one tournament I was playing (one of my freerolls) this guy says "Acesedai (that's my screen name) you are terrible. You are such a donk!"

"WHAT!" I thought. The thing that blew my mind here was not only had I not been involved in a pot with this guy, I hadn't done anything that was even close to unreasonable. I thought back and in the preceding half hour or so I'd only played three hands. Two of them were medium pairs and since the blinds were big and I was somewhat short stacked I moved all in. I got called once by AQ and won and the other time I'd stolen the blinds.

On the third hand, which was about 4 or 5 hands before this guy started yapping, I moved all in for about 4,000 from the button with A5. The blinds were 400/800 with a 50 chip ante so there was already 1650 in the pot and I would have been more than happy to just win the blinds. But the big blind had pocket tens and called me. I was about a 70/30 underdog, but I flopped an ace and won the pot.

So when the guy said what he said I responed with "Thanks, same to you." Which launched him into this massive rant about how I was moving in way to much and I didn't know what the hell I was doing. At this point he had less than 1,000 chips (I had over 8,000), so I said "Great, hows that 1,000 chip stack working out for you? Good luck with that." On the very next hand he goes broke. But I get more ranting from him concluded with "I KNOW you (meaning me) are a losing player!" WHAT! I know I should have just stopped reading, but I was getting cheezed off (I think that's what it was). So I replied "You couldn't be more wrong." There was a little more back and forth in there, but I can't exactly remember it.

Then presumably he used one of the various websites out there (like sharkscope and the pokerdb) where you can search other players by username and get a summary of their past results. I knew he'd looked me up because he started spiting back correct data about my past results while telling me how much I suck. Let me say that again. HE LOOKED UP MY RESULTS AND CONTIUED TO TELL ME HOW MUCH I SUCK! It made no sense.

So I looked him up. He'd played about 900 SNG's with an average buy in of $20 and was winning about 50 cents per. I won more today than he's won in all the SNG's he's ever played! I tried looking up his cash game stats, but they only keep track of games bigger than $1/$2 NL and $5/$10 limit and he had no data, meaning the biggest games he'd ever played in were smaller than those limits. I pointed out these facts to him and he told me how much I sucked. Somebody get on the piranha phone!

This is why I try to ignore the chat box.